UNA "YOGI" MUM AL MARE - Diario Day Two

Ieri con il mio entusiasmo di cominciare bene le vacanze, come Dio comanda- non con aperitivi tutte le sera ma con la volontà di fare un po' di esercizio fisico tutti i giorni ( oltre lo yoga, ovviamente!) ho fatto gonfiare uno di quelli palle enorme che si trovino nelle palestre. Le mie bimbe erano molto più entusiaste di me devo dire, e si sono lanciati sopra come se si trovassero in uno di quei parchi con i giochi gonfiabili, solo gratuitamente. E già subito cominciano i litigi:

Ma adesso è tocca A ME!

No, tu l'hai avuto per molto più tempo!

Io: bimbe fate a turno

Ma lei è stata sopra per una vita!!!!

Ma non è vero!!!!!

Et. Et.

Ad un certo punto ho avuto un'idea grandiosa. Non di buttare la palla fuori dal balcone, e neanche le bimbe, ma di fateli utilizzare il timer- quella cosa che si usa per capire quando è pronto la pasta, in modo che potevano usare la palla per lo stesso esatto numero di minuti ciascuna. Geniale!

La Grande sale sopra svogliata, senza lo stessa gioia di prima - sembrava una foca ferita sopra una roccia, mente La Piccola guardava altrove con uno sguardo tra noia e "disappointment". È suonato il timer e hanno cambiato gioco.

E lì ho capito che il "efficiency" (quasi svizzero in questo caso - cavoli ero fiero di me!), è la morte del gioco e che l'assenza del gioco vuole dire smettere di essere bambini. Nel insistere in "fairness" (uguaglianza?) sono riuscita a sradicare qualsiasi elemento di divertimento dal gioco. Il gioco non era la palla in sè ma includeva il discutere, il litigare. E come ho imparato dal libro "litigare per crescere" (grazie lorella!) se non possano essere lasciati a litigare togliamo la possibilità di sviluppare la capacità di risolvere problemi.

E forse questo vale anche per noi adulti.

YOGA HABIT VACANZIERE PART TWO

Prima abbiamo parlato di un metodo per stabilire un abitudine yoghico giornagliero (http://lpyoga.blogspot.it/2012/08/10-mosse-per-un-yoga-habit-vacanziere-e.html) - magari iniziando ADESSO (domani?!).

Ora vi darò qualche idea per  cosa fare durante qui 15 minuti al giorno. Unico regola (come ho già scritto) non decidete alle 6.00 di mattino - pre-pianificate un programma da seguire.

Vi dico quello che faccio io, solo per darvi un idea (vedete le foto qui sotto).

Ho notato che quando smetto di insegnare nei periodi delle vacanze (perciò il tempo sul tappettino diminuisce drasticamente) la prima cose che diventano meno flessibili sono le vertebre cervicali, poi noto che le torsioni sono meno ampie/aperte, e sembra che in poco tempo i quadricipiti anteriori pian piano si accorciano. 

Così un giorno faccio una torsione che lavora sui cervicali, seguito dalla candela e l'aratro, e il giorno dopo faccio un back-bend inavvanti (paschimatanasana) , e 2 torsioni che lavorano più sulle gambe  (per voi consiglio vivamente UN unico piano per i  prima 26 giorni). Faccio questo piano perchè è un misto di qualcosa che MI PIACE, e di cui HO BISOGNO. 

A me piace inizare sempre con cane che si stira (adhomukha svanasana) in dinamico - fa miracoli per la schiena e...it feels SO good. 

Perciò, magari iniziate con cane che si stira,  poi potete scegliere uno dei seguenti:

1. Il saluto al sole

2. Se siete allievi a Lotus Pocus - la sequence che facciamo al inizio come riscaldamento.

3. Un mio "spinal spiral sequence" Ho fatto un piccolo video clip di questo quà (mi dispiace è l'unico che ho sul Youtube per adesso!)  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8fdX4XhS_ZE

4. I 5 Tibetani (se non avete fatto questo con un insegnante e siete principianti magari scegliete qualcosa altro).http://lpyoga.blogspot.it/search?q=Five+tibetan

5. Se preferite qualcosa di meno dinamico, un piegamento in indietro, uno in avvanti  e una torsione,  tutto seduto (vale lo stesso!).

6. Un equilibrio tipo l'albero, un equilibrio con torsione, una posizione di apertura tipo il pesce (matsayasana).

Le possibilità sono infinite! Trovate il giusto per voi. 

Finite con un bel savasana.

DAY ONE

cane che si stira in dinamico (appoggia le ginocchia e poi tirati in su,  circa 8 volte)

A.

B.

Torsione (con il mento che sale verso la spalla e poi scende diverse terra, circa 5 volte)

A.

 Poi lascia che entrambi spalle casano giù per terra (tenedo le due ginocchia appoggiate a terra)

B.

 Candela

 Aratro

 DAY TWO

Piegamento in avvanti

A.

 B. 

Con torsione portando il gomito per terra oltre il ginocchio apposto.

Finisco con torsione così, provando di tenere il busto indietro, aperto.

Poi savasana!

UNA "YOGI" MUM AL MARE. DIARIO day one

Dopo un giorno intero di riempire valigie partiamo per Liguria. Appena inseriti in casa, bimbi al letto e questo mio corpo stanco nello sdraio sul balcone, comincio a godere la brezza e il leggere a caso. E trovo questo articolo che mi sconvolge: com.http://zenhabits.net/kids-ultralight/ cioè come insegnare i bimbi come/di viaggiare super leggeri.

Leo Babauta mi parla del suo viaggio di UN MESE e 10 giorni (!) al estero e quello che hanno messo nella valigia di ciasuno dei loro bambini. Ditemi che mente, vi prego!:

2 paia di mutande

2 paia di calze

1 paio di bermuda/shorts

deodorante e spazzolino denti

Un libro

iPod o Nintendo DS con carica batteria 

Anche noi siamo partiti con due di qualcosa a testa - cioè due VALIGIE. Sì, siamo in 4 e siamo partiti con 8 valigie/borse. Mi vergogno. ( 3 di questi devo dire erano di cibo- per far si che il mio marito portava su la spesa per questi 20 giorni a piedi e non io, visto che non abbiamo la ascensore e che poi lui torna alla tranquilità della città senza di noi). 

8 borse per 20 giorni. Mi sento ridicola. 

E ho dimenticato i spazzolini dei denti. Sigh.

Anyway. Leo autore del articolo si trovava di lavare un paio di mutande e calze tutte le sera ma evitando così di spreccare un giorno a fare i baggagli. Cosè meglio? 

Vantaggi di baggagli MINIMAL super leggeri:

1. Non devi portare in giro mezza casa in 325 zaini, dislocando una spalla.

2. Hai meno da dimenticare.

3. Hai meno da perdere.

4. I bimbi sono autonomi e possano fare e portare le loro cose.

5. Non sprecchi una giornata intera a riempire borse e liste "to take"

6. Magari ti ricordi lo spazzolino dei denti.

7. Se devi prendere l'aereo porti tutto con te abordo.

8. Hai meno stress.

9. Hai meno scelta.

Svantaggi dei baggagli superlight:

1.Devi lavare le mutande. Spesso.

2. Non avrai quel lungo stretto abitino nero con i lustrini blu, solo nel caso......

3. Hai più scelta.( sì "più")

Vedete voi.....e Buon Viaggio!

ps. questa "rubrica"si trova sul mio pagina Facebook:  "Lotus Pocus"

10 MOSSE PER UN "YOGA HABIT" VACANZIERE (e magari oltre)

PART ONE

1.Decidiamo di cominciare  (aggiungere al nostro routine) SOLO  questo! Solo lo yoga. Tutto il resto (cominciare il nuoto, allenarci per una maratona etc) DOPO,  quando l'abitudine dello yoga è ormai  stabilito. Se vogliamo stabile sul serio un nuovo routine/abitudine bisogna farlo UNO ALLA VOLTA.

2.Decidiamo cosa sarà il nostro "trigger" cioè un azione che svolgiamo tutti le volte appena prima che tiriamo fuori il tappetino yoga. Per me é lavarsi i denti. Ma potrebbe essere bere un cafè, scrivendo un "x" sul calendario indicando il giorno di  oggi, una doccia. Preferibilmente non una colazione inglese.

3.Lo facciamo  per MINIMO 26 giorni. Se un giorno salta grazie  ad una serata sociale un po' turbolente o qualche grappino in troppo - ok, nessun problema. Ma mai saltiamo DUE  giorni di seguito. 

4.Cominciamo in PICCOLE DOSE! Molto molto importante questo! Se pensate di poter fare  un ora al giorno, dimezzate a 30 minuti. Se pensate di fare mezz'ora al giorno dimezzate a 15 minuti. Se pensate di  fare 6 asana decidete di fare solo 3 durante questi si spera primi 26 giorni. Io vi consiglio,i 15 minuti al dì.

5.Facciamo SEMPRE allo stessa ora ( più o meno). Consiglio vivamente di farlo appena svegli ( anche se questo vuole dire svegliarsi prima). Così non c'è ancora  la lucidità mentale per dire a noi stessi " ma invece di fare yoga potrei controllare Facebook, o uscire per un cappuccio" ci alziamo, facciamo  subito la nostra azione "trigger" e tiriamo fuori sta tappetino. Punto.

6.Quando iniziamo abbiamo un sacco di motivazione. Siamo lì già in savasana e diciamo "già finito? però! ..... quasi quasi faccio anche un saluto al sole". NO! Non dobbiamo essere tentati. Questo non è un esercizio nel ascoltare quello che ha bisogno o vuole il proprio corpo ( lo faremmo questo dopo) adesso in questi primi 26 giorni il nostro unico scopo è quello di  stabilire un ABITUDINE  yoga. Se iniziamo con poco tempo o con poche asana, il successo direi quasi garantito.

7.Decidete prima una programma/piano yoga da seguire, mai decidiamo al momento in questi primi 26 giorni. Potrebbe essere che scegliamo  solamente il riscaldamento che facciamo noi prima della lezione a Lotus Pocus, o una sequenza tipo salute al sole, potete scegliere quello che vi piace di più ( un equilibrio, torsione e back-bend) o quello di cui senti più il bisogno. personalmente il mio è un misto di questi due. 

8.Dopo la pratica fatevi un piccolo "reward". Potrebbe essere il cappuccino della situazione, una colazione fuori, un mezz'ora leggendo un libro o guardando internet (non email!). Magari adesso addirittura bacon e eggs. Qualcosa di piacevole.

9.Se un giorno saltiamo NON ci auto- condanniamo! Domani torniamo al nostro piano.

10.Comunichiamo il nostro  intenzione di stabilire un abitudine yoghico giornaliero con quelli che potrebbero fare il tifo per noi: il  partner, amante, amici, vicini di casa, colleghi di lavoro..... E tenergli updated con il nostro progresso. Se riusciamo  a fare un report ( email, a voce, come preferite)  agli amici etc ogni giorno ( o ogni paio di giorni)  che  un 15 minuti dedicato alla pratica è stato concluso,  è molto probabile che la pratica diventi un abitudine sul serio.

ps. ho deciso che da adesso in poi il mio blog sarà in ITALIANO, condividerò i post da Facebook anche qui in modo che quelli fuori dal pianetta FB non perdano nulla. Ho avuto una richiesta di mettere la "rubrica/diario" UNA "YOGI" MUM AL MARE " che pubblico già sul FB, anche quì. Sarà fatto!  per quelli che li avete già letti, ignorateli pure. 

RECENLY READ

For those of you who'd rather avoid Facebook, I thought I'd pubblish my "RECENTLY READ" additions here on my blog too, as I wouldn't want you guys to get left out. So here are two books for you to consider. 

( If you'd like to follow this and other yogic content and photos  on my Facebook page search under "Lotus Pocus" and you'll find me! - but in the meantime.....)

"YOGA - WISDOM AND PRACTICE" by B.K.S Iyengar
or in Italian under the title: "YOGA - PENSIERO E PRATICA"
Today Elena and Nadia asked me to suggest a good yoga book to help them do a bit of practice at home. This one by possibly the worlds greatest ever yoga guru B.K.S Iyengar, is his latest and probably his most user friendly. It's great for all levels as it has a bit of everything - from his philosophy behind yoga to the asana, the later which are presented by a frighteningly perfect model with legs one would die for that just seem to fit into the right place with a precision of alignment that seems to smack of something Swiss. But don't let that put you off (the perfection I mean - I love Swiss people! Lots of my friends are Swiss! :-) The photos are actually great and give a good ideas of how to render a super challenging positions possible to the most trunk-like of us. However the book isn't that technical when it comes to positions and doesn't have as many as a home-yogi practitioner may like. You could always try "Light on Yoga" by the same guru but it's so heavy going it may put you off forever - I certainly wouldn't suggest it to a beginner. Of all his books I'd start with this one. I'm glad to have this book amongst my collection. 

I'd give it **** (out of 5)

"TEACH US TO SIT STILL" by Tim Parks
I'm constantly attracted to books about keeping still, slowing down, meditating (and being a buddhist sympathizer : Buddhism) I guess this is indicative of what I need (my husband thinks it's just indicative of having married someone extremely boring, and puts it on a par with train spotting.)You know..... like when you're feeling a bit pale and peaky and your body tells you that what you really need right now is a big fat juicy STEAK (oops! Maybe that's why I can't become a Buddhist!!!....actually the fact you have to be a vegan to be one is an urban myth - so I can't really use that as an excuse. I'm just too ....BUSY to be a Buddhist ;-)
So when my student Mara mentioned this book and title I thought "this is for me!".

Let me be clear. It is NOT a bundle of laughs. It's not sexy. It is not high adventure, and it's not even a hard sell for meditation (so if you are an experienced meditator looking for written "pat on the back" confirmation for cushion sitting as it's a "fabulous thing to do", this is not the book for you), although it does get the point across.

It is extremely DRY. Excuse the pun. It is BLUNT. An unflinchingly honest portrayal of a man (Tim Parks) brought to his knees by his own body and its inexplicable pain. Thought to be caused by prostrate gland problems the doctors, almost to his horror, told him his prostrate was actually perfectly functioning. Doctors could suggest no reason for his intense discomfort, his peeing problems nor a solution other than tranquilizers and pain killers.
And so Tim begins this (true) tale of his journey to reconcile his mind with his body. In desperation he starts to turn towards.....well, among other things, sitting still.
Although not a laugh a minute there is a quiet humor here (Tim Parks lives in Italy so I, as an ex-pat in Milan, loved his accounts of the people and the place). I found the whole book very compelling, and difficult to put down.
If you are suffering from some kind of inexplicable pain, concerned about the effects of stress and pace of life on your body, and/or are interested in flirting with meditation (or even if you are not) I highly suggest this book. 

I'd give it ***** (out of five) But then again I am quirky and I admit "train spotterish"  in my reading material. Be warned. 

WHY MEN SHOULD DO YOGA

Gabriele our Vinyasa teacher at Lotus Pocus

• If you are sporty whatever sport you partake in,  you will get better at it! Yoga makes you strong, flexible and focuses your mind. At the end of the day in competitive sports what gives an athlete the  cutting edge over his rival is not so much physical superiority but a mental or psychological one. Just ask a marathon runner or tennis player (read Andrè Agassi's autobiography "Open" if you don't believe me) . Being serene and focused will get you further than a pumped up bicep. 

• Yoga tends to work on  your weaknesses - so if you're strong you get more flexible and if you are flexible you get stronger.

• Yoga is not about lazy housewives going "OM". It's HARD. It's PHYSICAL. It's challenging. At least it is in my classes (and even more so in Silvia's and Gabriele's) . 

• Going to yoga classes is a great way to meet interesting, emotionally intelligent people. I can safely say that in all the years I have taught yoga  I can't remember anyone whom I really haven't liked. This may be due to memory loss or bad judgement but I think neither of the two as I can't say the same for the people I've met over the years at the gym (generally speaking!!! gym goers forgive me! I'm one of you too!). People who do yoga are interested in staying healthy (not just "pumped up"), physically and mentally, who understand that your  body is not just a form of transport for your head. There's a link between the two.

• Yoga is not about about drifting off in a haze to incense and indiany music. It is about working  physically  to reap the rewards of INNER CALM .So if you feel stressed, try it, it works. 

• Guys are supposed to be all muscly, brave, strong, calm, collected, confident, cool, unflappable. This is, to use a slang British term, PANTS. A man who strives constantly to be the above comes acrss as being....well.... emotionally barren (a shame as women like guys who can show their emotions)  and is  generally repressed. Everyone has feelings. If you are constantly trying to hide emotions and feelings  as they bubble up you are going to get STRESSED OUT. Pretending to be something you are not is stressful. I had a student who appeared at my center who seemed a kind  of Mr. Universe in all senses - tough, rough, bulky, seemingly unfazed by any upset or trauma, yet who in his sleep would grind his teeth together until he was chomping at his protein bars with his gums. Let the barriers down and get onto that sticky mat!  According to Dr. Haim G. Ginott if you constantly stop a child from moving freely (don't run! Don't go so fast! Sit still! etc. etc.) that child will become aggressive. You must not repress a child's need to move. The same can be said for emotions. If you bottle them up, one way or another they will bubble to the surface, perhaps through aggressive behavior, being moody, feeling the need to be isolated from others, suffering insomnia - these are just some indications of something being stifled. Yoga allows you to look IN  to discover what it is you are feeling. And this is the beginning of a healthy relationship with yourself. Knowledge is power especially when it comes to our bodies, minds and emotions. If you have lots of emotions hiding under the surface yoga gives you a healthy physical and mental way to release them.

• Most people who do yoga politically hang to the left. I said MOST! Not all ;-) Ok  - that is supposed to be funny,  but is has been the case in my experience as a teacher. However I want to make it clear that Berlusconians ARE WELCOME to my center ! I think we learn more from those who think differently from us that those who don't - be OPEN. And I am to everyone. And luckily we don't tend to have political discussions between one asana and the next. So relax. We won't know if you don't tell. 

• Yoga gives you a REAL break as supposed to zoning out through something evasive: new car, watching footie with your mates, Call of Duty, Internet, internet "For Other Things", gambling, dangerous sports etc. etc.  All these things in small doses ok,  why not? But they take you AWAY,  leaving you feeling empty. Yoga allows you to go inward and leaves you feeling relaxed, serene and full. It also leaves an echo of these things once you have come out of the class, so effects you (and therefore the people  around you) during the day. I don't know if you can say the same for "Call Of Duty". I hope not. 

• If you are worried about  being the only guy in the class  - don't be. A) no one is looking - and B) they are a compassionate bunch. You will be welcomed or if you prefer, ignored. It is up to you. Whatever the case,  you will be very much respected! I promise.

• Ok I have used generalized to a horrible extent in this post - forgive me! The subject topic being "MEN" lead me to sin in this way. Don't take me too seriously! But if you are a guy, come along and give yoga a try. Most centers offer a first class free of charge, make the most of it and look around before choosing. Yoga is VAST, and can change drastically according to type and  instructor - experiment and find both that are appropriate and right for you. 

Most of this post applies to the women too  :-)

HEART TO HEART (Part One: Friendship and Introverts)

Ok I am socially inept. My socializing skills could be compared to that of a limp lettuce leaf. I admit it - which is why I have to work at it so hard. I still don't get it right. Remember the film "Dirty Dancing"? When the girl (awkward, plain and impressed) walks into the dance hall carrying a rather large fruit in her arms? She sees  Patrick Swazey for the first time - sweaty, and in theory gorgeous (although not my cup of tea personally) who  points in her direction and unamused  growls  "What's SHE doing here?" she stammers "I .....bought the watermelon!" Cringe. Yup  - that's me. I so know how she felt. 

Often in the yoga class one hears about "anahata chakra" the chakra of the heart. I try not to ramble on too much about it as I think all this talk about chakras just gives us one more thing to get attached to. One more thing to "resolve" ("emotional energy block" - tick! Got one of those!),  one more thing to get done on our "to do" list ("be more open with others" or in some cases, "less"). I think most of us have  emotional baggage  and problems. One of the hardest things to get through in life is that barrier between  ourselves and another. Starting conversations with people can be excruciating, and silences even worse. Getting to know someone or rather having someone else getting to know us, is a mine-field. We're often so careful about the message we are trying to get the other to perceive and so flooded with internal dialogue that the other person gets faded out of the equation.  The barrier is not only high but it's also think, dense. It takes more than the time to down a Bloody Mary to begin to kindle and reap the rewards of friendship.  But when one does make it across to the other side it is usually incredibly rewarding. 

Stop reading for a moment to think about the best times of your life. A couple of seconds to contemplate moments of when you felt joyful at ease, happy. You may notice that the most rewarding, fulfilling moments involved other people-  your friends (and depending on your luck - your family). If friends equate with happiness then they are a very valuable commodity.  The good news is there's no shortage of people out there! They are EVERYWHERE! Our problem is not an unrealistic  demand for rare goods, but often a unacknowledged demand for a market that is wonderfully flooded. We don't want to believe we need people, and even if we do we often don't have the courage to bridge the gap between "you and I". Pretty ironic really.  There is a shortage of GUTS not of people/potential friends. 

If you ask a prisoner who has been tortured what the worst form of torture is they say: solitary confinement. That is indicative. Being social is intrinsic to our being, our nature (whatever that is). You can be starved broken, and dangerously dehydrated, but nothing will make you suffer as much as being isolated. Which means the opposite is also true: nothing will make you feel as good as being with people/friends. 

How the hell do you make friends? You need to be brave. If I have to talk chakra, it's about opening our heart, risking it, being open to vulnerability.  It's about ASKING QUESTIONS. Never let a silence lose you (the opportunity of making) a friend. Bridge the silence gap (Gently. you don't want to come across as being a complete nutter.)

Here are 10 tips, truths and pointers I've had to learn to make "opening towards others" a little easier (I always say in my yoga class that anahata chakra is my favorite - that's just because it's one I need to work on the most).

1. Everyone has something to give you (and I'm not talking about anything tangible - unless it's the guy at the greengrocers'). 

2.It can be the most unlikely person that gives and relates the most.

3.What you think about people before you know them, is usually wrong. 

4.Throwing a question into silence with someone you don't know is always worthwhile. Try it. Have any of you had the experience of making a really good friend due to an off chance comment made on the spur of the moment? It can happen. It's up to you to make it happen. 

5.Being shy sucks ( I know I am shy) and it's also egocentric (worrying about yourself more than the other).If you are shy try with your posture to open out, to lengthen your spine. It may make you feel more confident and will give the message that you are up for talking. Try to think  of this talking business as a curious experiment in personal development (rather than an exercise in pain endurance).

6.He or she is just as fragile/scared/worried about making a good impression as you are.

7. PAUSE. This is not the script nor timing of the dialogue from the film "Mission Impossible". Unlike in Hollywood movies most people need to think before they talk (and most people come across as more intelligent when they do). You want to be spontaneous, witty, funny, smart? Then give your brain the time to be able to do that. Talking through difficulty is like holding a challenging  yoga position. It's advisable to pause before deciding "I can't do this!". Breathe. Relax and Wait and  it'll come. Don't just throw in any old words in a desperate attempt not to look stupid. Because guess what....? Watermelon.

8.Listen.

If this is a skill that you have already managed to grasp, try this:

9.Listen with your EYES. I'm not kidding. Stop wondering what you are going to say and look rather than listen. You don't NEED to concentrate on listening! The words will passively enter - they will be absorbed ANYWAY. Look at/into the other person's eyes, you will understand/connect  more and the other person will know that he or she has your attention. There's no greater gift you can give than this: your attention.

8.Unlike "Mission Impossible" usually a conversation does not have to fight against the clock. Especially when you're out for a few drinks. Don't worry. There will be enough time to have a turn at talking too - honest! Trust me on this.

9.I haven't quite figured out how to do this (I'm SO bad at small talk)but, everyone has something that makes them TICK. A passion. Try to find out what it is, rather than what job they do. Don't ask me how as I'm still working on it. 

10. Dhanurasana (as wonderful as it is)  will not make you friends and influence people.Unless you do it at a dinner party. But I don't advise it myself. Try talking instead. 

Homework: try saying something to someone you would have previously kept quiet with. Just to see! 

Ps. I may well have written something similar in other posts - I've tried to skim read them to check but I got bored ;-)  So forgive me my repetition just in case!